Pooja's Picks: Going Through It
Five links for wading through these waters.
Hi, folks!
Welcome to the June edition of Pooja’s Picks.
It seems like an almost universal truth that we are all going through it right now. I’m not trying to sugarcoat that or even fight it — instead, I’ve got my head down just trying to stay afloat, and keep taking steps forward.
Today I’m sharing some links that remind me that while this moment is so hard, it is temporary, and I will move through it, and so will you.
As a reminder, Pooja’s Picks is my monthly list of reads, recs, and things that resonate. (Check out my April and May picks, too.) These recommendations don’t include affiliate links (unless specifically stated).
1. Modern Love: Why Boys and Men are Floundering, According to Therapist Terry Real
I heard Terry speak for the first time at The New York Times’ Well festival last month and was blown away. His style is definitely brash and in your face. But he speaks truth. And I appreciate his take on what's going on for men and boys. (FYI, this is paywalled for Times subscribers. I usually try to share links that are open for everyone, but unfortunately I’m not able to gift link this one, and I loved it so much I still wanted to share it.)
For more of my thoughts on this topic, read The Culture War Comes for Boy Moms.
2. Navigating the Grief of Losing My Mother, 18 Years Later by , author of
This essay is about how grief never goes away — and that’s okay. It’s not supposed to. It changes shape and form. And it’s also our way of staying connected to the people we’ve lost. Rebecca’s words are poetic, piercing, and apt for any type of grief.
3. Learn to Love Your Tricky Brain and Unlock Your Greatest Leadership Gifts — at SXSW
Morra Aarons-Mele talks and writes about leadership, work, and mental health. I love Morra's reframing here of neurodivergence as something we can be proud of, as opposed to an enemy. (For more from me on this topic, read How to Cope with an ADHD Diagnosis.) I met Morra earlier this year when she moderated a WBUR Cityscape menopause and midlife event that I did with
and Dr. Sherri-Ann Burnett–Bowie. She’s hilariously truthful and whip-smart, you’ll love her SXSW talk.4. Slip: Life in the Middle of Eating Disorder Recovery by
Mallary is a journalist and professor at UT Austin. In Slip, a mix of memoir and research, she describes her own eating disorder recovery. I really appreciated this book because Mallary acknowledged how difficult EDs are to treat, and how, for most people who suffer from them, it's not a clear black and white “I'm sick” or “I'm not sick, I'm cured,” but instead a lifelong dance.
5. Snarky responses to things people say to twin parents
I've been re-watching this reel, like, once a week, and each time I literally LOL — and feel for parents of twins. I’ll soon be able to relate!
From the Real Self-Care archives:
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A framework for predicting the future
Resistance and resilience mean that we keep coming back to ourselves and to our people. That is all there is.
You are reading Real Self-Care, the weekly email newsletter written by psychiatrist and best-selling author Dr. Pooja Lakshmin MD.
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📲 For more on making it through These Times, read Quick Thoughts: Do the Next Small Thing.
Thank you so much for including SLIP!